whoops

ahahahaha i FAIL. attempt number one at having a sketch a day completely did not work. time for strategy number Two. for a college writing class i have to create a creative project for part of my final portfolio. i have [with help of the lover] decided to have a dream diary for the next three weeks. and write a final paper on dreams and what they are, what certain things signify. what the things in my dreams signify. and how this is going to affect me? something like that it will be brilliant and fantastic. jolly good. how i incorporate the drawing a day into this is i will sketch a sketch that accompanies the dream in someway. perhaps not in an explainable way. but in a way. just a way.

i have now decide to write whatever i feel like in this blog. and not give a damn. i also have realized that i am incapable of being incredibly personal in something i can't control who views. which makes perfect sense. i think. i mean.. whatever. so the personal thoughts that i have will be kept in a dark secret moleskin that will never see the light of day. now i just have to find a moleskine. pretty sure i have one somewhere. i will go and find it. and write? i guess.

for the dream journaling. i read/heard somewhere that if you wake up quickly you have a more difficult time remembering dreams. so i guess that means i will have to forewarn the people in my lovely family of three not to touch or look and speak to me in the morning. yes. that is good. i like that excuse for not being disturbed as i disengage myself from dreamland in the morning and try to brace myself for a day of dealing with people. and stress. and things that i must now think about. for life. why does life have to be so complicated

you know how when you read histories. the characters that play in our past all have clear and detailed motives and consequences. history books go back through and erase all the fuzzy sketchy lines that living people have to wind their way through in the today. it would be so nice to live life like the past. not having to wonder. why or how. who or when. when. if IF goshdarned iffy if if. worst word EVER. i think. if and asparagus. both so chockablock full of ickyness that you can't even imagine the ickyness involved in its icky self.

lalala